well... when you are in lust with someone, you think their snoring is cute. When you are falling in love with them, you want to smother them with a pillow, but the idea gives you so much joy you giggle too much to do it... and then you invite them over again in spite of your murderous urges!
I dunno, I don't know how it is for other people. When I fell in love I felt completely differently to how I had felt about any of the guys I liked before hand. I felt like he was the only person in the world, I didn't really think about it, but if I had the question would have been, is this love or am I going insane? Not, is this love or lust? but I don't know if that is different for everyone?
Definately, if you think he is awesome, amazing, perfect, then it isn't love, it is lust. Love is when you know the things that are broken about him (not his "backstory" but the reality of him as he is now in all his flaws and baggage) and you love him anyway. And you giggle at his fears of bearded men but go out of your way to shave any male friends you have visiting; rather than listening in reverant awe about it. etc.
I dont think Ive ever thought anyones snoring was cute.... But I do remember those feelings of wanting to smother people.... Haha
Its not that I think he is perfect, tho he is awesome and amazing. I just dont think Ive ever 'clicked' with someone like this before and it freaks me out. Especially given what he doesnt want to happen....
Im trying to still just relax and go with it and see what happens, but you know what Im like. I over analyse and panic frequently...
yeah, but clicking isn't the same as being in love. You and I clicked, and you didn't think you were in love with me... :p
Firstly, at the moment it is just chemisty. And chemistry gives out on you. Secondly, you don't know him well enough yet to really be in love with him. Thirdly, your brain enjoys these endorphins and wants you to keep feeding it this drug, so it is telling you that you have strong emotions for him because it knows that is the best bet to keep you doing it. If you weren't having sex with him, this feeling would be fading rapidly. Either stop believing your brains propaganda, or stop having sex with him - you aren't allowed to convince yourself you are in love with this guy, cause he made it clear that you two aren't going to have more than friends with benefits and he will go elsewhere if he thinks you are pushing those boundries.
Granted - I do know Im not in love with him. Just trying to distinguish between that 'falling' feeling, and just pure lust. Which given the amazing sex, it could totally just be lust, if it wasnt for the laughs and the cuddles and the sillyness....
That was a little bit of harsh 'tough love' but admittedly, needed. Given that i dont plan on stopping having sex with him anytime soon (did I mention it was amazing?!!), I need to stop my brain from doing the stupid things it does.
I did get the idea that the sex was amazing... I wonder where I got that idea from?? :p
Because I love you, it is my sad duty to kick you a little bit if I think you are about to hurt yourself. Sorry. :( But think of it this way, I am very sorry for the harsh tough love (and I will keep trying to be less blunt) but its only in order for you to keep having amazing sex! :D I have the best intentions!!!
Umm not sure where you got that idea at all hahaha.
No its ok - the kicking was needed. I think my other problem is that Im so used to boys being dicks (and mean when I was at school) that I get surprised when I get along with them still, and think it must mean more than it does. It makes me get very inappropriate crushes, and develop feelings that are not always appropriate either.
Damn you Nora.
Yes I like your intentions. I plan on sticking to them also so that I reap the benefits.
Last night he asked me if Hayley had a boyfriend, and I was like 'not at the moment'. And he goes 'do you have a boyfriend'. To which I replied 'not at the moment, but bring it up again and I'll punch you in the face'.... lol. he laughed and apologised and then we made out some more. Weird...
Firstly, ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha "Bring it up again and I'll punch you in the face" ahahahahahahahahahahaha. I love that! Other answers include "oh, yeah, of course, didn't I mention Steve?" :p
But you are right, that is seriously weird...
And yeah, school can really screw up how you relate to people! You are the kind of girl guys really like to hang with. You are smart, funny, you give shit just as well as you take it and you aren't afraid to punch them when they need it (and don't flip out if they rough-house back) but you don't kick in the balls for crimes less then murder and cheating. You aren't high maintence - in short you are awesome. Guys like you... and will be great friends (and the kind of friend I think you need -positive, no bitchyness etc; girls like that are rarer (though you have found some great ones)) as long as you can keep your emotions sorted. Boys on the other hand (as opposed to guys), like high maintance princesses because those kind of girls ACT like the boys SHOULD like them, and the boys have no idea what they should like at all so they do as they are told. Once they grow up some and understand girls a bit better that "you should like me" vibe becomes less effective, because guys realise that it comes from girls who also think "you should do everything for me, do everything I say, and in return you will get nothing from me".
Well Hayley looked at him really blankly at the door and didnt realise who he was. So I told him it was cos of all the men that visit and she was having trouble keeping track of them all haha.
Thanks hun :)
Its the fact I know Im awesome that means I'll make a great non-high-maintenance girlfriend. And its that fact that makes me angry when guys want nothing more than being friends, even when its friends with benefits included.
10 comments:
Time?
Is there really much point to labelling your feelings? Just do what you want to do. :)
Yeah I guess. Strong feelings just scare me haha. Especially in this case...
well... when you are in lust with someone, you think their snoring is cute. When you are falling in love with them, you want to smother them with a pillow, but the idea gives you so much joy you giggle too much to do it... and then you invite them over again in spite of your murderous urges!
I dunno, I don't know how it is for other people. When I fell in love I felt completely differently to how I had felt about any of the guys I liked before hand. I felt like he was the only person in the world, I didn't really think about it, but if I had the question would have been, is this love or am I going insane? Not, is this love or lust? but I don't know if that is different for everyone?
Definately, if you think he is awesome, amazing, perfect, then it isn't love, it is lust. Love is when you know the things that are broken about him (not his "backstory" but the reality of him as he is now in all his flaws and baggage) and you love him anyway. And you giggle at his fears of bearded men but go out of your way to shave any male friends you have visiting; rather than listening in reverant awe about it. etc.
I dont think Ive ever thought anyones snoring was cute.... But I do remember those feelings of wanting to smother people.... Haha
Its not that I think he is perfect, tho he is awesome and amazing. I just dont think Ive ever 'clicked' with someone like this before and it freaks me out. Especially given what he doesnt want to happen....
Im trying to still just relax and go with it and see what happens, but you know what Im like. I over analyse and panic frequently...
yeah, but clicking isn't the same as being in love. You and I clicked, and you didn't think you were in love with me... :p
Firstly, at the moment it is just chemisty. And chemistry gives out on you.
Secondly, you don't know him well enough yet to really be in love with him.
Thirdly, your brain enjoys these endorphins and wants you to keep feeding it this drug, so it is telling you that you have strong emotions for him because it knows that is the best bet to keep you doing it. If you weren't having sex with him, this feeling would be fading rapidly. Either stop believing your brains propaganda, or stop having sex with him - you aren't allowed to convince yourself you are in love with this guy, cause he made it clear that you two aren't going to have more than friends with benefits and he will go elsewhere if he thinks you are pushing those boundries.
But Em, I am utterly in love with you.... :)
Granted - I do know Im not in love with him. Just trying to distinguish between that 'falling' feeling, and just pure lust. Which given the amazing sex, it could totally just be lust, if it wasnt for the laughs and the cuddles and the sillyness....
That was a little bit of harsh 'tough love' but admittedly, needed. Given that i dont plan on stopping having sex with him anytime soon (did I mention it was amazing?!!), I need to stop my brain from doing the stupid things it does.
Back at you baby! RAAOOOAAAWWWWW
I did get the idea that the sex was amazing... I wonder where I got that idea from?? :p
Because I love you, it is my sad duty to kick you a little bit if I think you are about to hurt yourself. Sorry. :(
But think of it this way, I am very sorry for the harsh tough love (and I will keep trying to be less blunt) but its only in order for you to keep having amazing sex! :D I have the best intentions!!!
Umm not sure where you got that idea at all hahaha.
No its ok - the kicking was needed. I think my other problem is that Im so used to boys being dicks (and mean when I was at school) that I get surprised when I get along with them still, and think it must mean more than it does. It makes me get very inappropriate crushes, and develop feelings that are not always appropriate either.
Damn you Nora.
Yes I like your intentions. I plan on sticking to them also so that I reap the benefits.
Last night he asked me if Hayley had a boyfriend, and I was like 'not at the moment'. And he goes 'do you have a boyfriend'. To which I replied 'not at the moment, but bring it up again and I'll punch you in the face'.... lol. he laughed and apologised and then we made out some more. Weird...
Firstly, ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha "Bring it up again and I'll punch you in the face" ahahahahahahahahahahaha. I love that!
Other answers include "oh, yeah, of course, didn't I mention Steve?" :p
But you are right, that is seriously weird...
And yeah, school can really screw up how you relate to people! You are the kind of girl guys really like to hang with. You are smart, funny, you give shit just as well as you take it and you aren't afraid to punch them when they need it (and don't flip out if they rough-house back) but you don't kick in the balls for crimes less then murder and cheating. You aren't high maintence - in short you are awesome. Guys like you... and will be great friends (and the kind of friend I think you need -positive, no bitchyness etc; girls like that are rarer (though you have found some great ones)) as long as you can keep your emotions sorted.
Boys on the other hand (as opposed to guys), like high maintance princesses because those kind of girls ACT like the boys SHOULD like them, and the boys have no idea what they should like at all so they do as they are told. Once they grow up some and understand girls a bit better that "you should like me" vibe becomes less effective, because guys realise that it comes from girls who also think "you should do everything for me, do everything I say, and in return you will get nothing from me".
Well Hayley looked at him really blankly at the door and didnt realise who he was. So I told him it was cos of all the men that visit and she was having trouble keeping track of them all haha.
Thanks hun :)
Its the fact I know Im awesome that means I'll make a great non-high-maintenance girlfriend. And its that fact that makes me angry when guys want nothing more than being friends, even when its friends with benefits included.
Men. Gah
Post a Comment