So.... the boy.
Been hanging out for 2 weeks. Things "moved on" the other night. And then last night he says "I really enjoy your company, and i dont want to muck you round. I am looking for some fun, but not a relationship."
Cue some sadness and a few tears.
The problem is, when Im spending time with him, I am actually genuinely happy. For anyone that knows me, especially lately, that feeling in itself is quite a miracle. Everything is great and amazing and I dont remember the last time I felt like that with anyone.
And now, thinking about it and the fact that he doesnt intend it to go anywhere, makes me sad and a little angry, cos I know I deserve more than that.....
But I dont want to give it up cos he is amazing and we get on so well and 'everything' is actually amazing. So now I dont know what to do.
And for the record, when i asked if he was 'having fun' with anyone else, he told me that he wasnt and he wouldnt be that cruel.
I know that staying 'hanging out' with him could be painful in the long run if I get my hopes up and wish for it to become more than it is. But then I think if I just remember that its not going to be anything long-term then maybe it will be ok.
I dont know. Im sure I just want people to say that Im young and Im allowed fun and happiness without having to expect anything further down the track. But what do you honestly think?
3 comments:
I think you should do what makes you happy, but if you keep hanging out with him you may get hurt. You obviously like him a lot, and if you keep hanging out you may get more attached. In saying that, it would also hurt to cut him loose I suppose. Who knows, maybe after a while he will change his mind in what he wants for you both and may realise he wants a relationship? I'm sorry, I'm terrible with advice. Keep hanging out but don't put your heart out where it's vulnerable. keep him in mind as 'just a friend' :)
I feel the need to say, relationships when two people are not on the same page often lead to tears. He wants less than you do, if you can handle only what he wants you can have a relationship, but you can't make him come further forwards to where you want to be.
Think carefully about weather you can really handle a relationship that will never be what you want it to be before you go in.
Also so impressed your using this, I keep meaning to blog things myself and never manage.
xo
Yeah I get your point Nim. That said, the way things are now arent that bad. I think I can deal with it - cos I am getting a LOT of benefits hahaha. Wont go into too much detail......
If we are friends that have amazing sex then thats ok for now Ive decided, but I need to keep that in mind that its all we are....
Yeah I hardly ever use it also but resolving to now as part of a new thing :)
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