Day 11: A song from your favourite band
Favourite band is a hard one. But we'll go with the Foos, as it most consistently is... Plus Dave is pretty in this video :)
So started the new job. Its scary, and makes me nervous/anxious that Im doing things wrong. I think its just cos I care?? I dunno. Ive never had a job I actually really cared about before... So far so good. The people I work with are lovely. And so far the clients are good... No dramas :)
That said I went in this morning to do some nursing, and there are 2 cats who are likely to be euthanaised. Part of the job, and for these 2, its for the best, but still sucks when you cant do anything for them :(
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Saturday, July 17, 2010
Day 10
Day 10: A song that makes you fall asleep
I dont know that it makes me fall asleep, but I love listening to Jeff Buckley when Im going to sleep so I figure that counts :)
My head is working against me today. Jeremy was grumpy last night after going to the movies (to Predators of all things - I do not recommend it) because he was hungry, and once he gets too hungry, and his blood pressure drops, he just gets purely focused on food and cant see much else. I was tired and sore and grumpy and not that hungry so I didnt care, but didnt enjoy getting dragged around through town to get where he wanted to go. So cue spastic moody Candi.
This morning, we went out to get food for breakfast and after his first mouthful he said 'ok now im happy' - and my stupid head took offence, and decided that meant I didnt make him happy and that food will always come first. But then food, water and shelter are the basic needs of life right? So it makes sense. And i am just being silly and yet I cant seem to stop it. Grrr.
Oh well hopefully once I get settled at work and start going to the gym and stuff then that will even me out a bit more, cos I am sick of being the spastic girlfriend who is changing her moods all the time, so much so that I am almost giving myself whiplash, let alone anyone else...
I dont know that it makes me fall asleep, but I love listening to Jeff Buckley when Im going to sleep so I figure that counts :)
My head is working against me today. Jeremy was grumpy last night after going to the movies (to Predators of all things - I do not recommend it) because he was hungry, and once he gets too hungry, and his blood pressure drops, he just gets purely focused on food and cant see much else. I was tired and sore and grumpy and not that hungry so I didnt care, but didnt enjoy getting dragged around through town to get where he wanted to go. So cue spastic moody Candi.
This morning, we went out to get food for breakfast and after his first mouthful he said 'ok now im happy' - and my stupid head took offence, and decided that meant I didnt make him happy and that food will always come first. But then food, water and shelter are the basic needs of life right? So it makes sense. And i am just being silly and yet I cant seem to stop it. Grrr.
Oh well hopefully once I get settled at work and start going to the gym and stuff then that will even me out a bit more, cos I am sick of being the spastic girlfriend who is changing her moods all the time, so much so that I am almost giving myself whiplash, let alone anyone else...
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Day 9
Day 09: A song that you can dance to:
Whats worse, is I know all the moves to the chorus.... hahaha
Last day at Stats tomorrow - woohoo :)
Havent been to the gym since my signing up day last week, but once this week is over I'll be able to get into it :)
Whats worse, is I know all the moves to the chorus.... hahaha
Last day at Stats tomorrow - woohoo :)
Havent been to the gym since my signing up day last week, but once this week is over I'll be able to get into it :)
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Day 8
Day 08: A song that you know all the words to
And the live video just makes it was cooler :)
In other news - ARGHHHH!!
I dont know why Im so irritable and moody at the moment. My period is not due. I guess I am stressed with finishing work and starting a new job. And working both at the same time the last two weeks (not too dramatically but enough to make a difference I suppose...)
I just have become this horrible moody bitch - poor Jeremy. He cant do anything without me getting pissed at him for it basically. He is very tolerant but its got to wear on him. He said he was trying not to take it personally but what a pain in the arse I am. And the fact that I know Im being a bitch makes it worse cos then Im mad at myself for being one in the first place.
Theres all this talk about "thinking yourself happy" but does it actually work??
And the live video just makes it was cooler :)
In other news - ARGHHHH!!
I dont know why Im so irritable and moody at the moment. My period is not due. I guess I am stressed with finishing work and starting a new job. And working both at the same time the last two weeks (not too dramatically but enough to make a difference I suppose...)
I just have become this horrible moody bitch - poor Jeremy. He cant do anything without me getting pissed at him for it basically. He is very tolerant but its got to wear on him. He said he was trying not to take it personally but what a pain in the arse I am. And the fact that I know Im being a bitch makes it worse cos then Im mad at myself for being one in the first place.
Theres all this talk about "thinking yourself happy" but does it actually work??
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Day 7
Day 07: A song that reminds you of a certain event
My 21st party theme was 'Dress as a song' and I dressed as this one - so it reminds me of that - funny how that works.....
Hmmm dont have much else to say. My mornings at the clinic are going well - although it makes me so much less motivated when I get back to Stats - only 3 more days!! Oh and a few more hours today.... Cant wait :)
I told Jeremy he was being a little weird and clingy last night. But reassured him that I still love him and Im not going anywhere, and he should feel free to be who he is. He was a little worried cos he talks in silly voices, and is more emotional and vulnerable than most guys I guess. But I do like that side of him too - except if Im in a grumpy mood. We have good talks about stuff. I enjoy being able to communicate. Those are words I didnt think would come out of my mouth (or get typed/written by me) anytime soon haha
My 21st party theme was 'Dress as a song' and I dressed as this one - so it reminds me of that - funny how that works.....
Hmmm dont have much else to say. My mornings at the clinic are going well - although it makes me so much less motivated when I get back to Stats - only 3 more days!! Oh and a few more hours today.... Cant wait :)
I told Jeremy he was being a little weird and clingy last night. But reassured him that I still love him and Im not going anywhere, and he should feel free to be who he is. He was a little worried cos he talks in silly voices, and is more emotional and vulnerable than most guys I guess. But I do like that side of him too - except if Im in a grumpy mood. We have good talks about stuff. I enjoy being able to communicate. Those are words I didnt think would come out of my mouth (or get typed/written by me) anytime soon haha
Monday, July 12, 2010
Day 6
Day 06: A song that reminds you of somewhere
This song reminds me of Japan - I went in 1999 for a high school trip for 2 weeks. There was 7 girls, and then teachers/parents. We used to wander round the streets singing this song out loud. Good times :)
Ok so I had the weekend away. And I definitely did notice the lack of Jeremy. But maybe its because I was the one who was away and doing stuff, but I dont feel like I really missed him. And not as much as he missed me. Is this a bad thing?? I almost feel slightly smothered by just how much he missed me.... I think its just an adjustment thing, and my stupid head telling me that its scary just because its new, and because Im not used to it. I dunno... I think I may just be silly, and probably scared of being happy
This song reminds me of Japan - I went in 1999 for a high school trip for 2 weeks. There was 7 girls, and then teachers/parents. We used to wander round the streets singing this song out loud. Good times :)
Ok so I had the weekend away. And I definitely did notice the lack of Jeremy. But maybe its because I was the one who was away and doing stuff, but I dont feel like I really missed him. And not as much as he missed me. Is this a bad thing?? I almost feel slightly smothered by just how much he missed me.... I think its just an adjustment thing, and my stupid head telling me that its scary just because its new, and because Im not used to it. I dunno... I think I may just be silly, and probably scared of being happy
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Day 5
Day 05: A song that reminds you of someone
Funny - it doesnt make me think of the current one at all. But I do associate it with old Jeremy due to jokes made about it, and being very into the song at the time I met him. I guess it will always make me think of him - although luckily, less painfully than it used to.
Had a weekend away - it was nice. Though it was also nice coming home to someone. And it was nice to be missed so much hehe :)
Funny - it doesnt make me think of the current one at all. But I do associate it with old Jeremy due to jokes made about it, and being very into the song at the time I met him. I guess it will always make me think of him - although luckily, less painfully than it used to.
Had a weekend away - it was nice. Though it was also nice coming home to someone. And it was nice to be missed so much hehe :)
Friday, July 9, 2010
Day 4
Day 4: A song that makes you sad
Makes me cry most times I hear it - even prettier live and acoustic. Kelly Clarkson is amazing and this song always makes me think about my mum - its my song to her pretty much, if she deserved it....
This weekend I am going up to Feilding to hang with Amy and have some girl time, after she broke up with her partner a few weeks ago. She seems to be doing really well but it will be good to have time to ourselves. It will be the first weekend Ive spent apart from Jeremy in some time too - part of me will miss him, and part of me is happy for the break. I hope thats normal :)
Thats about all for today
Makes me cry most times I hear it - even prettier live and acoustic. Kelly Clarkson is amazing and this song always makes me think about my mum - its my song to her pretty much, if she deserved it....
This weekend I am going up to Feilding to hang with Amy and have some girl time, after she broke up with her partner a few weeks ago. She seems to be doing really well but it will be good to have time to ourselves. It will be the first weekend Ive spent apart from Jeremy in some time too - part of me will miss him, and part of me is happy for the break. I hope thats normal :)
Thats about all for today
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Day 3
Day 3: A song that makes you happy
So many many possibilities. I have purely gone with the first one that popped into my head:
Makes me think of Friday nights in Murphys in Auckland dancing with Em :)
So had my PT session yesterday. My body fat is like 41% - eeeek. Admittedly, I thought it would be over 50% so thats a relief. But it does mean I am carrying approx 41kgs of fat... Sick. My fitness level is in between low / fair - so definitely room for improvement. Exciting possibilities :)
Ummm not much else to say today really
So many many possibilities. I have purely gone with the first one that popped into my head:
Makes me think of Friday nights in Murphys in Auckland dancing with Em :)
So had my PT session yesterday. My body fat is like 41% - eeeek. Admittedly, I thought it would be over 50% so thats a relief. But it does mean I am carrying approx 41kgs of fat... Sick. My fitness level is in between low / fair - so definitely room for improvement. Exciting possibilities :)
Ummm not much else to say today really
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Day 2
Day 2: Your least favourite song
Any song by Ke$ha - they just played one on the radio and it reminded me how much I dislike her. In fact, hate her music. So much so I cant even bring myself to put it any of them on my page....
Having training at my new job - very tired Candi. Yesterday and today I have come into normal work about 6am, left for the clinic at 7.30, worked there 8-9.30, head back to work, and yesterday I then worked 10-5.30. Today I am finishing at the much nicer time of 3.30, but thats just to go to the gym for an hour PT session that I get upon joining to sort out a programme and body composition and stuff.
I know my body fat percentage is going to be high. Possibly scarily so. But its still something Im dreading. But it will be good to put a number on it and realise just how much I NEED this, for my own life basically and to avoid all sorts of health concerns... I predict tears even. Fun
Any song by Ke$ha - they just played one on the radio and it reminded me how much I dislike her. In fact, hate her music. So much so I cant even bring myself to put it any of them on my page....
Having training at my new job - very tired Candi. Yesterday and today I have come into normal work about 6am, left for the clinic at 7.30, worked there 8-9.30, head back to work, and yesterday I then worked 10-5.30. Today I am finishing at the much nicer time of 3.30, but thats just to go to the gym for an hour PT session that I get upon joining to sort out a programme and body composition and stuff.
I know my body fat percentage is going to be high. Possibly scarily so. But its still something Im dreading. But it will be good to put a number on it and realise just how much I NEED this, for my own life basically and to avoid all sorts of health concerns... I predict tears even. Fun
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Day 1
Day One: Your Favourite Song
So hard. I change my mind every so often. This is simply the first one that popped into my head that I can listen to over and over and never get sick of:
In other news.....
I dont know whats going on but Im particularly down and angsty the last few days. My partner is too tired to have sex, so I cry and pack a sad and feel rejected. That sort of thing. Its first thing in the morning and we do have sex but he doesnt quite "finish", and I decide thats cos I am not good enough, and cry and pack a sad and feel rejected.
The good thing is that I sort it out in my head, and he talks me through it, and is very accepting and understanding. But that doesnt mean its ok. Its not fun for either of us, and its pissing me off. Which in turn just makes it worse cos then I am angry at myself for crying and packing a sad and the cycle keeps going.
So I think it might be time to seriously track down a counsellor and start working through this crap. For my own sake, as well as for the sake of my relationship...
On the plus side, I have a new job, doing what Im actually qualified to do (well actually the job is largely reception with vet nursing thrown in, so thats all good - a nice way to ease into it). And Ive joined a gym. And I have this nutritionist thing starting at the beginning of next month. So hopefully they will all help contribute towards a happier and healthier Candi
So hard. I change my mind every so often. This is simply the first one that popped into my head that I can listen to over and over and never get sick of:
In other news.....
I dont know whats going on but Im particularly down and angsty the last few days. My partner is too tired to have sex, so I cry and pack a sad and feel rejected. That sort of thing. Its first thing in the morning and we do have sex but he doesnt quite "finish", and I decide thats cos I am not good enough, and cry and pack a sad and feel rejected.
The good thing is that I sort it out in my head, and he talks me through it, and is very accepting and understanding. But that doesnt mean its ok. Its not fun for either of us, and its pissing me off. Which in turn just makes it worse cos then I am angry at myself for crying and packing a sad and the cycle keeps going.
So I think it might be time to seriously track down a counsellor and start working through this crap. For my own sake, as well as for the sake of my relationship...
On the plus side, I have a new job, doing what Im actually qualified to do (well actually the job is largely reception with vet nursing thrown in, so thats all good - a nice way to ease into it). And Ive joined a gym. And I have this nutritionist thing starting at the beginning of next month. So hopefully they will all help contribute towards a happier and healthier Candi
A bit of blog spam - which should also encourage me to at least write a little every day.
A music meme, which you have to add to ever day with the following:
Day 01: Your favourite song
Day 02: Your least favourite song
Day 03: A song that makes you happy
Day 04: A song that makes you sad
Day 05: A song that reminds you of someone
Day 06: A song that reminds you of somewhere
Day 07: A song that reminds you of a certain event
Day 08: A song that you know all the words to
Day 09: A song that you can dance to
Day 10: A song that makes you fall asleep
Day 11: A song from your favourite band
Day 12: A song from a band you hate
Day 13: A song that is a guilty pleasure
Day 14: A song that no one would expect you to love
Day 15: A song that describes you
Day 16: A song that you used to love but now hate
Day 17: A song that you hear often on the radio
Day 18: A song that you wish you heard on the radio
Day 19: A song from your favourite album
Day 20: A song that you listen to when you’re angry
Day 21: A song that you listen to when you’re happy
Day 22: A song that you listen to when you’re sad
Day 23: A song that you want to play at your wedding
Day 24: A song that you want to play at your funeral
Day 25: A song that makes you laugh
Day 26: A song that you know how to play
Day 27: A song that you wish you could play
Day 28: A song that makes you feel guilty
Day 29: A song from your childhood
Day 30: Your favourite song at this time last year
First day to follow :)
A music meme, which you have to add to ever day with the following:
Day 01: Your favourite song
Day 02: Your least favourite song
Day 03: A song that makes you happy
Day 04: A song that makes you sad
Day 05: A song that reminds you of someone
Day 06: A song that reminds you of somewhere
Day 07: A song that reminds you of a certain event
Day 08: A song that you know all the words to
Day 09: A song that you can dance to
Day 10: A song that makes you fall asleep
Day 11: A song from your favourite band
Day 12: A song from a band you hate
Day 13: A song that is a guilty pleasure
Day 14: A song that no one would expect you to love
Day 15: A song that describes you
Day 16: A song that you used to love but now hate
Day 17: A song that you hear often on the radio
Day 18: A song that you wish you heard on the radio
Day 19: A song from your favourite album
Day 20: A song that you listen to when you’re angry
Day 21: A song that you listen to when you’re happy
Day 22: A song that you listen to when you’re sad
Day 23: A song that you want to play at your wedding
Day 24: A song that you want to play at your funeral
Day 25: A song that makes you laugh
Day 26: A song that you know how to play
Day 27: A song that you wish you could play
Day 28: A song that makes you feel guilty
Day 29: A song from your childhood
Day 30: Your favourite song at this time last year
First day to follow :)
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